It has to happen! For a true Sadhak, he will lose interest in the worldly things. The Vairagya will happen. Of course, three years! Everyday two times! You are preparing for making a smooth transition from this life.
But you see, the problem will start now; ‘I am in a kind of depressed state!’ you know. No interest in the super market, no interest in the politics; this party or that party. No interest in films, no interest in buying plots, no interest in the stock market. No interest at all, in the outside world!
So, it is very difficult to explain this state, I can very easily understand this, I have gone through this.
‘I am going through my job forcefully, for last 1-2 years, as I have lost interest in doing the same things, again and again. Also, I feel to avoid talking to others, as I enjoy the company of Self’. You see, it has to happen!
‘Now sadhana has become integral part of my life, I wish Mother will soon provide clarity on my life situation, at present that I am going through’- Actually, this happens as you progress. Where you don’t want to talk too much, you don’t want eat too much, you don’t want to drink too much, you don’t want to sleep too much. You want to be with yourself. Sometimes, too much noise irritates you. You know, earlier you were so happy, but now you are not happy. Even at office when people come to you, and chat about other things like weather, incidents, but you are no more interested in them. So, people start seeing you in a different way, wondering what has happened to him? It’s the same case in the family too, what has happened to my husband? What has happened to my wife? No interest in talking.
As you progress detachment happens in the outside world and more you are attracted to the inner world. So, this is a sign, that you are living your last life. It won’t happen to all. When I tell this, you have to understand why this won’t happen to all students. Why does this happen to the only few chosen ones? Because you are living your last life, last birth on this earth, it is symbolically shown to you, that this is my last life, I need to express my divinity.
You need to know how to express your divinity. You shouldn’t worry about what others think of you. If I lose my job, what will my parents think? What will my family think? So if it is your last life, only then, will you feel this way.
And this is not for everyone. But don’t get disheartened and leave your sadhana. It won’t happen to all, but to the ones who are truly sincere, who have surrendered to Divine Mother, allowed the divine will and they are seeking for Moksha and true liberation, to such people all these things will happen.
Firstly, understand that this is a blessing for you. This is grace and Mother will start showing you the way forward. Because once question has arisen, then the answer will follow. She will bring new solutions to your life, new purpose to your life, the soul agenda will manifest to you.
Not to worry, but just one thing that you could do is to continue with your relationships, continue with your job and whenever possible, maybe during weekends, express what you want.
If you want to teach something, start teaching. If you want to paint, start doing that. If you want to be a singer, start doing that. If you want to do some gardening, do that. If you want to be a farmer, start doing that. You have to channel your expressions during the weekend or at least one day during the week or at least one day in a month. Then, this depression state will go away! Its very important!
To handle this situation is very difficult. As you advance you don’t know what is happening to you. How should I balance this? I am not happy with the outside things. I feel everyone are so different! I don’t belong to this world! so many questions arise.
So be careful about this, and try to attend the Satsang, meet like minded people, be with them whenever you get the opportunity, and if they have same goal or common interests join them. Express yourself! Maybe that could be your job on this earth too after your transformation. So, you have to find your own expression. Creative expression, purpose of your life. And that should be your passion, and not a burden like your present job, forcefully you shouldn’t be doing it. It should make you happy and joyful. So, as you progress, your expression will change and your life will change, your creative ability will change. I pray for you, don’t worry. Mother will guide you to find your expression on this earth.
Srividya level-1, 2 & 3 workshop held on 25th & 26th Feb 2023 in Bangalore.